Previously uselesseevee, bu-harmonics, thefatpatriciarepublic, bb18hereicome, and thejuryjacker

 

shouldnt:

THE FACT THAT THE AMERICAN PEDIATRIC SOCIETY TOLD AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEMS THAT TEENS SHOULD NOT BE UP BEFORE 8:30 AND ONLY 15% OF SCHOOLS LISTENED ANGERS ME SO MUCH

gogglechild:

spaceace8:

idjtits:

spaceace8:

idjtits:

idjtits:

idjtits:

are pears flammable

after 2 hours of trying to set alight to a pear i can condclude they are not flammable

mum: whats that smell
me: burning pears
mum: wha-
me: i tried to set a pear on fire
mum: why
me: science

#It’s science as long as you write it down

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science

[science clapping] well done friend

you forgot your data table:image

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averagefairy:

why do they even include 2014 as an option when selecting your birth year online like u fresh out the womb ready to join gmail

jasonttodd:

callmekitto:

crackiswhacksherlock:

moriarty:

jashuwa:

moriarty:

what do you mean not everyone has a toilet that washes and massages your butt

Wait there are toilets like that?

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what an incredible experience it must be

im mildly concerned about something labeled “turbo” going near my butt

Played 6,638 times

chemicalsirens:

malcolm—freberg:

arasbakedgoods:

jocastagatesodom:

rancestan:

jocayden:

GETTIN SO CRUNK RN 

I CANt

Is this on iTunes??

TURNT UP

Can I make this my ringtone?

dont hate me anyone but i think this hilarious sorry XD 

dean-the-piesexual:

OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND SHE SAYS “My son told me an inappropriate joke today, and he told me he got it from you” AND I WAS SUPER CONFUSED??? SO I ASKED HER WHAT THE JOKE WAS AND APPARENTLY HE SAID “how do skeletons communicate? They bone each other” I AM SO DONE

dean-the-piesexual:

OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND SHE SAYS “My son told me an inappropriate joke today, and he told me he got it from you” AND I WAS SUPER CONFUSED??? SO I ASKED HER WHAT THE JOKE WAS AND APPARENTLY HE SAID “how do skeletons communicate? They bone each other” I AM SO DONE

blacksagegod:

nataliemgc:

skinneycunt:

phosphorescentt:

can we please destroy this idea that a person has to talk to you every minute of every day to like you

texting all day is not natural

force communication all hours of the day is not natural

amen to this

MAN LISTEN!!!

Lookahere bruh!

allthingsbb16:

pussy mode cowboy
little bitch mode cowboy
lame mode cowboy
scaredy mode cowboy
chicken mode cowboy
sucky mode cowboy
beast mode piece of shit

feel free to reblog and add your own

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feast mode cowboy